( Just so "I didn't tell you so", but I'm one of those people who has a busy schedule, but still loves to role play, and tries to find time in between the two. I'm also unfamiliar with this site, so please be patient if I seem…green. =P )
Name: Fang "The Daydreamer"
Age: 19 Seasons
Tone/Eye Color/Build: An unbroken shade of creamy cinnamon brown, with crisp green eyes and an average build in muscle.
Weapons: Rusted short sword, Commando's knife, chipped dagger.
Clothing/Armor: Torn army tunic and cloth pants under indistinguishably battered iron armor.
Faction/Unit Attachment: Fort Tatterack/ Darian Tundra Legion, Third Battalion.
Personality: Fang is a very withdrawn and observant individual, especially when by himself. This is due to two reasons. Repetitive strife and combat earlier in his bloody life is a factor, and the larger reason is because of the quiet solitude and loneliness he has faced ever since losing contact with the Fort. The ferret is not cruel; he was known for his light playful humor as a young'un. Even though his demeanor may seem empty and cold, on the inside is a much different story. Thoughts constantly swish and slide through his head like fish. He tends to be sweet and gentle towards the females, believing that they should be treated with respect. Fang is humble, but not a pushover.
Encounters: As a Darian Tundra Legionnaire, Fang has made intense hostile engagements with snowsquirrel tribes, pirate corsairs, and outlaw bandit factions from the east. As for friendlies, Fang has had previous contacts with neutral villages and tribes throughout the places he has traveled.
**Intelligence Report:**Intense studies has revealed a little about this lone soldier. Although not much is known about his actual place of birth or family, Fang's youth was brought up in years of violence and murder. As his small culture practiced the involvement of battle to prove one's worth, Fang tested his own mettle when he boldly stopped an invasion of bandits from his village, earning him great honor. In some point in his life after he set out on his own adventures outside of his home, Fang became a bounty hunter for a short time. He captured a number of bounties and earned a substantial amount of wealth before deserting his profession, and strangely abandoning his money to the poor. Here, he began to walk endlessly, leaving his home and other familiar places behind. It was in the 13th season of his life that he appeared in a vast, cruel, and cold land. The sea lay to his west, a forest lay to his east, and a looming structure stood to his north. Fang had stumbled upon Fort Tatterack and her lot. Recruited into this place for his tenacity and heart, the ferret became part of the Darian Tundra Legion, one of many ferocious armies under the command of a wolf by the name of Jadak the Fang. Over time, Fang grew accustomed to the blistering cold and stinging saltwaters of the fort he now called home. Fang soon took a disliking to the High Command of Tatterack; they had the tendency to leave wounded troopers behind in battle, believing only the strong were fit to survive. He advanced in rates, earning some respect in the ranks. As an inner rebellion began to crumble Tatterack and her ambitious leaders, Fang and his legion deployed to the tundra to ward off suspected opposition. He became lost during a blizzard-plagued battle, and, losing his sense of direction, wandered blindly in the unsympathetic region. The ferret walked on, keeping a time log in his rucksack and living off the icy shrubs of the Darian Tundra. Without aid, without companion, and without an end to the tundra in sight, the ferret quickly lost hope. His eyes became deep, his mouth turned to a frown, and his once proud strut turned into a cool, silent stride. But still Fang bore on with his journey, no destination in mind. His sole purpose to live was to defy Death. After all, the ferret was only 16 seasons of age. He knew that if he lived, he would've achieved more than he ever thought he would. Climbing over snowy mountains, swimming through deep rivers, jogging into thick grasslands, and hopping past canyons, Fang made his way into an even more mysterious land, where the sun humidly lay in the sky, sending out blazing rays of sunlight down into stuffy, serpent-filled forests. The lone soldier had stumbled upon the surrounding region of another great stronghold. Redwall.
Strange Quirks: Because of intense battle fatigue and the seriousness of almost every situation he has ever been in over the last six years of his life, Fang is not easily susceptible to being attracted to females. His mind has no time for such things. Although he does not know if he can still do it, the ferret unconsciously snorts when he laughs. But Fang hasn't laughed for a while.
dragonnson last edited by
Perhaps, you should write a 'long_er_ summary' of your chara? It would clear things up a bit. And I would also like to know what he looks like beneath his clothing (fur color, patches, brawn…). And I was told that for 'Place of Origin', I should not write 'unknown'. If you like, you could give us a long_er_ summary of his origins and just tell us you didn't want anyone's charas to know about it.
Just thought I'd point those out.
Okay, I modified it to the standards. But for the summary, I'd like to keep it the way it is. I don't feel the need to add to it anymore. Not because I want to add a layer of mystery to him, mind you, but Fang's a character who starts out little.
Creigon Quall last edited by
Welcome to RL, Frink. Just call me CQ. ;) Is this your first RP profile? It is really good. You should start a thread or put him in one.
CyberStormAlpha last edited by
There's nothing wrong of the 'short summary' section on its own, but it doesn't serve as a substitute for a backstory/history. It's more of a character concept. You really ought to give him something for a history; 'lost soldiers' usually have a story behind them.
Well, okay then. I'll see what I can do! ^-^
Is that better? It sounds like more of an Intel document, but that's how I wanted it to sound. If that's okay.
And hola, CQ! It's nice to meet you. No, this is not my first RP profile. I actually am from Fort Tatterack, but when Namaste posted an advertisement there I came to check it out. So far, it's pretty cool. :*)
CyberStormAlpha last edited by
Hehe… (insert military branch-related jab here)...
Again, that works for a summary, but it's not a full backstory. What drives the character to do the things he does? Is he set right at the end of his summary, or has he had other travels before arriving in the RP area? There's a lot of shadowy area that just cries out for explanation.
Look; I've played the 'lost soldier' archetype before. What happened when Fang realized he was no where near his area of operations? What notable encounters has he had with locals, both benign and otherwise? How does he get what foodstuffs he needs to survive? Like I said before, there's a LOT of story to be told, if you're willing to give it the effort.
Ohh, okay, I see. I'll keep at it ASAP.
Seth last edited by
Hey, this really is very nice! :)
Just for reference though, could you add the "Strengths" and "Weaknesses" sections please? It's good to have about ten in each (Not emotional stuff; just phobias, skills and level of education. Stuff like that)
All right, but please remember that I'm someone with a semi-tight schedule, so the things that you guys want in my biography MIGHT come later than expected. I hope that's A-okay with you guys.
Sorry, to double post, but how old exactly is a season in human years? I haven't been on the ball lately with these sorts of things and I completely forgot. Since my character is 16 seasons, does that make him 16 years old in human terms? If so, I should change that. :P
And I'm working on the other information pieces as well. Just'll take a little more time than on average. Will I get kicked if I don't have a good enough biography? :-|
Fate last edited by
I think we're equating about one season to one human year of life. That seems to be the assumption. Yeah, he has an awful lot of life (and military advancement, hehe) for 16 years of age.
Nobody will kick you out for a bad bio.
Gee, guys, you've been fierce with him. lol I don't have half this much info on my profiles and nobody has picked them apart this badly! I guess that's cause I didn't shout for a critique. ;) Take your time, Frink, we just want to know enough to work with your guy (and sometimes against him :D ).
My big question is where does he fall in the good beast/bad beast dichotomy? He seems neutral to me. Does he avoid good beasts, hang out with bad beasts, assume good beasts will accept and like him, stick it on his own? He looks like a loner. And with his outfit and background, I'd imagine he might have trouble fitting in somewhere quiet, though he doesn't exactly seem to fit into a hoard either, does he? Though Nam might try to induct you into her hoard attacking Floret a little ways out.
Affirmative! Thank you, I was a little worried about my bio not being good enough or anything. I've never had this sort of problem before with being creative; I think it's because I'm stressed out alot.
And thank you again! I totally forgot about what "click" he falls under. Your right - he is a neutral sort of character; he was just brought up as a vermin. Should I include that on the profile description?
Fate last edited by
When you ask for opinions around here, you get them. lol
You could simply leave the Q's and A's in as a way of including more information as people want to know it. I've used responses to update my profile to keep it from getting cluttered, but most people don't. It's your choice. I would recommend including the profile link as part of your signature so people can find the info easily when they need it.